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Farmer's Only Dating Site

Started by The Dude, July 07, 2013, 13:45:03 PM

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The Dude



Lord only knows what kind of folks you could meet on this site.  I think we need to create a profile for Mudwall Gatewood and see what kind of response we get.
I was born by the river in a little tent, And just like the river I've been running ever since, It's been a long, long time coming, But I know change is gonna come.

Dougfish

I saw an spot for this on TV and assumed it was a spoof. Wow! Is there one for nerds? Rocket Scientists? Architects? Accountants? Horticulturists!?
Mud? Smite winner might give him barn cred.

benben reincarnated

I saw this on TV for the first time today.  Shittiest commercial I've seen in some time.  But pretty funny none-the-less.


Mudwall Gatewood 3.0

Quote from: The Dude on July 07, 2013, 13:45:03 PM
  I think we need to create a profile for Mudwall Gatewood and see what kind of response we get.

A date is absolutely the last thing I want or need at this stage of my life.  BUT, if and when I return in the next existence, and assuming my tastes have not changed, there is a definite brand of gal I would like to satisfy my reincarnated palate. 

•   Dark hair
•   Nice natural mammaries
•   Long athletic legs
•   Painted toes w/ toe ring
•   Prefers to wear the stiletto "throw me down and take me" shoes
•   Requires a dancing pole in our domicile
•   A wonderful cook and enjoys it
•   Does not fish or hunt , but enjoys wild game
•   Loves children and the elderly
•   Yellow dog Democrat
•   Enjoys gardening
•   Possesses rhythm
•   Can live and remain comfortable in the backwoods, but willing to travel
•   Likes pets

See what you can come up with Dude.  Do I have to provide information about my idiosyncrasies, my kinks, and my weirdness?  If required, then the deal is off.   Dude, solicit help, and fill in the blanks as you wish.
"Enjoy every sandwich."  Warren Zevon

Mudwall Gatewood 3.0

Quote from: steelrain202 on July 08, 2013, 05:42:24 AM
why dont you kidnap Annoying Pelosi she sounds like your type

Well she is a winner from the champion side, but unfortunately Nancy has been earmarked to become the mistress of you and TM in your next life, where she will bear each of you a son, and both lads will look like and have the musical talent of Dylan.   I really envy you boys! 
"Enjoy every sandwich."  Warren Zevon

The Dude


Be careful, now!

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I was born by the river in a little tent, And just like the river I've been running ever since, It's been a long, long time coming, But I know change is gonna come.

rbphoto

Quote from: The Dude on July 08, 2013, 15:41:32 PM

Be careful, now!

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I have one of those t-shirts.  Ain't afraid to wear it.

And until you have a daughter, you'll never know just how much that t-shirt means!
"maybe procrastination is another word for fishing..." ben
"Just butchered my first silk kitty...." Wooly Bugger  January 26, 2018, 12:41:27 PM
You can't land an otter on 7x. Now I know - Dougfish

Aka

Quote from: The Dude on July 08, 2013, 15:41:32 PM

Be careful, now!

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This is how I see it going down.


I'm sitting in my chair, the boy comes in the house and presents himself.
"Hi, I'm peckerhead, I'm here to take your daughter out."
Without saying a word I'll throw a 12 gauge shell at his chest full force then look at him and say, "behave or the next one will come at you a lot faster."

Mudwall Gatewood 3.0

Quote from: steelrain202 on July 09, 2013, 05:57:51 AM
Nasty has a 1st class ticket to hell....

Talk to Big J., he believes in hell.  I thought I was in hell on several occasions, only to discover I was in Charlottesville, and another time in Chapel Hill. 
"Enjoy every sandwich."  Warren Zevon

Grannyknot

Quote from: Mudwall Gatewood on July 07, 2013, 17:50:58 PM
•   Dark hair
•   Nice natural mammaries
•   Long athletic legs
•   Painted toes w/ toe ring
•   Prefers to wear the stiletto "throw me down and take me" shoes
•   Requires a dancing pole in our domicile
•   A wonderful cook and enjoys it
•   Does not fish or hunt , but enjoys wild game
•   Loves children and the elderly
•   Yellow dog Democrat
•   Enjoys gardening
•   Possesses rhythm
•   Can live and remain comfortable in the backwoods, but willing to travel
•   Likes pets


Muddy, lets have a contest.
You try to find this woman, and I'll start working on inventing a teleporter.  First one to success wins.  Don't hold yer breath.

Also, toe rings are of a lesser order, but still in the family of lower back tattoos, & women with dancing pole prerequisites should be thoroughly interrogated.
Flea is not the best bassist of all time.

Beetle

Quote from: Mudwall Gatewood on July 09, 2013, 08:07:51 AM
I thought I was in hell on several occasions, only to discover I was in Charlottesville, and another time in Chapel Hill.

You are starting to sound like a State fan Muddie.  thanks for the laugh